Readers are still talking about Suzanne Venker

Jun 9, 2011 at 4:00 am
FEATURE, MAY 26, 2011
MAMA DRAMA
The hand that rocks the cradle: I normally don't read the RFT because it is far too liberal for my taste ["The Feminine Mistake," Melissa Meinzer]. I literally walked right by it, but your cover story screamed out to me as I picked one up that someone else had left behind.

Your article on Suzanne Venker was on point! Feminism was an experiment that definitely has gone wrong, a bad joke played on the masses, and no one is laughing anymore. Mind you, we all have gifts, qualities and talents that must be put to use to energize our environment, and women must not be the shadow of a male and submit to the almighty "male boss." I would like to see women as complete and men as complete creatures of God, each with a purpose.

As to that purpose: Our children need nurturing in a bad way. There are only 24 hours in a day, and something is going to be left wanting — and this "Superwoman" wants to turn in her cape. It is now time to admit that no one person can be all things to all people and do everything. With headlines replete with tragedy after tragedy, the question becomes, "Who's minding the children?"

Remember, the hand that rocks the cradle rules the world. "Parent" is not just a noun — it is a verb, and hopefully after 50 years of this experiment gone bad, we'll do a 180. Look at my urban community with plenty of baby-mama drama going on.

By George, I think Mrs. Venker is on to something: the truth!
Karen Simmons

An echo, not a choice: I was completely appalled by the article "The Feminine Mistake" and the views of Suzanne Venker. It is insane that a woman with a college degree and such a family background feels the need to preach to other women on how they should live their lives. She has the audacity to assume what is fulfilling to her should be the same for all women around the world. This view is completely close-minded and lacking intelligence. And her opinion that women should not be in the workforce and would be perfectly happy staying at home and taking care of children for their fulfillment is absurd.

My mom stayed at home raising her ten kids for the last 30 years while my dad was the breadwinner. Now that all of the children are moving out of the house and growing up, my mom is back in school studying. She wants a career and time to learn and enjoy what education has to offer — raising ten children did not give her all the satisfaction she needed. She also went out and found a job that goes with her education. I have never seen my mother so happy and confident in herself. My mother depended on my dad for the last 30 years to bring home the money, and he did; he worked very hard for all of us. But now she has felt the accomplishments of providing for herself and her family. She loves it.

Venker says, "My job as a mother is how I define myself, and being a writer/pundit is secondary." This is not the case for every woman. Venker also said she grew up knowing that she wanted to be a mother, and more props to her. Other women grow up knowing they want to be doctors, artists, teachers, musicians, nurses, veterinarians — and then maybe mothers. None of these women are saying, "I am fulfilled as a doctor, so all women should be doctors, too." Who is Venker to assume what is best for all women and how they should be defined?

It is mothers like Venker who screw up their children into thinking this is how it should be for men and women. They are the people who grow up never gaining experience accomplishing goals because they are taught that they aren't supposed to do certain things due to the reproductive organs they have. There are many women who tried the domestic life and decided to raise their children alone because that is what makes them happy, or they stay married and find careers. If it weren't for society today and the choices we have, these women would stay in unhappy or in abusive marriages. Other women would stay unsatisfied as soon as their kids are grown because all that would be left is taking care of their husbands and vacuuming the floor.

Being an independent woman can be tough at times, but it is wonderful that we have the choice.
Jane Bourgeois, via the Internet