Who among us can't understand and appreciate suffering? I thought to myself. I felt a sense of spiritual connectedness. Life might be an exercise in suffering, and that suffering might be meaningless, but to make something beautiful out of it -- to rise above it, even -- seemed miraculous, inspiring.
I mentioned this to Brenda, explained to her my sense of awe.
"But I think you're concentrating on the wrong things," she said. "Seder is really more about hope. About freedom from suffering. Not suffering itself."
Still, I saw the ghosts of the suffering floating above the table. Who were they? I don't know: There was nothing anybody could do.