Here's what you do: You go to Guido's Pizzeria and Tapas on the Hill, and you say, "Chorizo pizza with mixed cheese." You see, Spanish chorizo bears almost no resemblance to its Mexican namesake. While the latter gets cooked up and crumbled into eggs or greasy cheese dip, Spanish chorizo slices dry, like salami. On a pizza, it flat-out slays pepperoni. And when you order your pie with mixed cheese at Guido's, the kitchen will temper the ooze of Provel with mozzarella. And when you put the three toppings together -- the chorizo, the mozzarella, the Provel -- it adds up to more than the sum of its parts. It's the perfect blend of highbrow and low, like a trust-fund kid in a trucker hat. Note: Unless you want to conduct a controlled science experiment, don't order the cheese "half and half," which results in a pizza with mozzarella on one side and Provel on the other.