It seems like just yesterday that Fifty Shades of Grey dropped a great, horny fire into the loins of women (and more than a few men) across this repressed nation. In truth, it's been more than three years since E.L. James released her masturbatory masterpiece, and the book is still driving prospective fetishists into the arms of Spankys. Many arrive curious about a particular item mentioned in the book — the Ben Wa balls. "People come in, they don't really know how they work," says one employee. The staff at Spankys is full useful knowledge, like the fact that the shiny metallic balls used by the book's titular character during an orgasmic spankathon with his sex slave are, in fact, mostly for strengthening kegel muscles. So, in the event that exercising your pelvic floor fails to get you off, the clerk can point toward the rest of the store's inventory, including items fit for the novice BDSMer. With racks of cuffs, straps, crops and toys of every bendable, foldable and insertable variety, Spankys is an erotica lover's portal to a better, hornier place. No reading required.
© 2018 Riverfront Times