Sometimes a romance just runs out of steam. Perhaps you no longer have common interests. Perhaps you've discovered his massive trove of hand-painted clown dolls. Whatever the case might be, when it's time to get out of a relationship, it's time. Dragging out the inevitable will make you cranky and delay your ability to find someone without 685 tiny ceramic Bozos. When devising a relationship-ending scheme, distractions are key. That's why the dinnertime breakup is a bad idea: Say, "It's not you, it's me" over appetizers, and you're stuck with at least two more courses of crying and/or yelling. No, you need a venue full of sights, sounds and objects to hide behind (just in case). You need the Saint Louis Science Center. A total blast for families, the science center is also the perfect place to create a diversion after delivering powerfully bumming news. Cower behind the giant T-rex. Perform a song of love and loss on the laser harp. Build a replica of a delicate structure and then knock it down (an obvious metaphor, but a good one). If he or she truly refuses to get the hint, say you're headed to the restroom, then buy a ticket to the OMNIMAX theater and wait it out. Wait. It. Out.
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