Best Martini

Absolutli Goosed

The classic martini can be an intimidating drink: no frills, challenging stemware, packs a boozy wallop. Rather than get all hoity-toity about it, Absolutli Goosed aims to educate. "Our talented staff is here assist you in any way they can," the cocktail menu says sweetly, before laying out in four simple steps the proper way to order as smooth as 007. That said, for seasoned martini veterans, this is a damn fine drink. Mixed up lightning fast (none of that lazy bartender eye-rolling), ice cold with nary an ice chip in sight, just the right kiss of vermouth and the kind of olives that contribute the perfect oily richness to complement the juniper bite of the gin. Oh, and they're huge and inexpensive (only $5 on Mondays). The menu also leaves the door open to all degrees of deviation, be it vodka instead of gin, okra instead of olives, to whatever a Fook Mi-Fook Yu is. No matter one's preference — iconic or iconoclast — there's nothing but satisfaction here.

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