“If someone could tell me what area this officer is patrolling today, I'd greatly appreciate it. I'll be the one driving the black 535 and not wearing my seatbelt. (I have a full tank; I can do this all day.) What? Too stalkerish?”
“It’s so hard to find a man in uniform who likes to be restrained.”
“Yeah cuz I'm looking at the seatbelt.”
“I'm looking at that old flip phone he's got on his belt haha”
“You made me zoom in down there....”
Support Local Journalism.
Join the Riverfront Times Press Club
Local journalism is information. Information is power. And we believe everyone deserves access to accurate independent coverage of their community and state. Our readers helped us continue this coverage in 2020, and we are so grateful for the support.
Help us keep this coverage going in 2021. Whether it's a one-time acknowledgement of this article or an ongoing membership pledge, your support goes to local-based reporting from our small but mighty team.
Join the Riverfront Times Club for as little as $5 a month.