An officer observed a suspicious vehicle in the rear of Ballwin Athletic's parking lot after hours. The officer contacted the two occupants of the vehicle who were found in the rear seat attempting to "stay warm." With the cold coming, we sincerely hope these individuals find more efficient ways of finding heat. Wearing all the clothes that you came to the parking lot with would probably be the best start.
Officers responded to complaints of solicitors in the area of Clear Meadows. It is unknown what they were trying to sell, but we are certain it was not doughnuts as our office is right up the street and they didn’t bother to visit us. Solicitors are required to obtain a license at City Hall before going door to door. These individuals were advised of the ordinance and left the area.
Officer Treaster responded to the area of Big Bend and Arbor Haven regarding a complaint of a traffic hazard. After a frightening confrontation, it was determined that the items were placed on common ground and were transported back to the police station for safekeeping. If you are the owner of three skulls, a tow hook with chains, and a floating killer clown head please come pick up your items.
An officer responded to a local car wash in regards to a report of a motorist trapped inside it. The officer was able to assist the driver out of the wash without incident. We didn’t even have to call our firefighter friends over at Metro West Fire Protection District, St. Louis County Missouri for extrication and disturb their nap time.
Officers discovered a man down in the area of Park and Holloway. Officers observed the man passed out, with a can of air duster pressed to his lips. After officers woke the man up, he advised that he was not "huffing," he simply fell asleep with a can of air duster by his face. We have rated this lie a .08 out of 10 on the believe-ability scale, and have filed the report appropriately. The man was transported to a local hospital in regards.
Our small but mighty local team works tirelessly to bring you high-quality, uncensored news and cultural coverage of St. Louis and beyond.
Unlike many newspapers, ours is free – and we'd like to keep it that way, because we believe, now more than ever, everyone deserves access to accurate, independent coverage of their community.
Whether it's a one-time acknowledgement of this article or an ongoing pledge, your support helps keep St. Louis' true free press free.