The charismatic Warner, one of the featured speakers at yesterday's event, gave an inspiring speech that stressed such sports' tropes as perfection, vision and perseverance. But we couldn't help but be alternately amused and horrified by an anecdote he included to illustrate one point about his five-year-old daughter, Sienna.
"I have five-year-old twins," he began, "and there's one we call 'Chubby'."
Warner went on to relate that he had seven kids, and so sometimes while the kids are in the pool, he or his wife will count heads to make sure everyone is accounted for. But if they get to six bobbing heads, he said, they know they're OK.
"We don't worry about the seventh one," he said. "If we don't see the seventh one, Sienna -- Chubby -- well, if she's not in the pool, she's in the pantry."
In fact, one day, Warner claims he had some rustling noises in the pantry, followed by a thud. He came in to find the little girl flat on her back.
Instead of crying, though, she smiled and held up a bag of Oreos: "I got it, Dad, I got it! I fell, it's OK -- I got my Oreos!"
Warner was using the anecdote to praise his daughter's perseverance. ("It's everything I can do to not smile and go, 'Yes!'" he told the audience. "I got one that's willing to sacrifice anything. I know it's Oreos, but it's a start!")
Still, we couldn't help but chafe a bit at the idea of calling a little girl "Chubby" to her face. Even Warner seemed to know he was treading a very fine line: "I know, I know. I'm going to give her a complex."
He concluded, "I won't show her this tape."
Call us crazy, but we suspect having your handsome athletic father call you "Chubby" to your face could be equally damaging -- even if you are five years old. Did you know one in five pre-teens are already dieting? Or that dieting at a young age is a huge predictor of being overweight later in life?
Suffice it to say, we're a lot less worried about this kid grabbing the Oreos, and a lot more worried about her all-too-public nickname. It wasn't exactly the Motivation! we came for, but we still couldn't get the moment out of our head.