Ugly T-Shirts Hope to Keep Pujols in St. Louis


I would like to announce my plans to post prints of this painting all over the city in order to make a new Pujols contract a reality.
  • I would like to announce my plans to post prints of this painting all over the city in order to make a new Pujols contract a reality.
We all want Albert Pujols to be a Cardinal for life. He's a once-in-a-lifetime player, the best baseball player I've ever personally had the pleasure of watching play the game. He's a paragon of consistency, putting up numbers within spitting distance of each other season after season after season. 

He's mostly an admirable human being, too. Having been in the locker room after games I can tell you he's not quite as pleasant to actually speak to as most people make him out to be, but he's one of the more charitable individuals you're ever going to come across. You can root for him without reservation, without fear his private life is going to be splashed across the front pages of the various tabloids next month. 

So yeah, it's understandable that everyone here in St. Louis would have some desire to see ol' number five wearing Cardinal red for a long, long time. The question is: What would you be willing to wear to see Albert wearing the Birds on the Bat

If the answer to the above question is, "A really ugly shirt I ordered off the Internet," then have I got a deal for you. You can head right on over to and order a Keep 5 Here T-shirt to show your support for the Cardinals re-signing their franchise cornerstone. 

Me? No, I won't be ordering one. My own feelings on re-signing Albert are much more mixed. Sort of like, "Keep 5 Here, but only if he's willing to sign a contract which is non-crippling to the franchise long-term. Also, the aging curve of players with his body type and skill set needs to be taken into account, so I would think the absolute maximum length of contract I would be comfortable with would be seven years. Maybe eight years at the very most. Keeping Albert in St. Louis is certainly the most expeditious way of maintaining a winning club, but only to the point where his contract demands begin negatively impacting the organisation's ability to build an overall talent base." Unfortunately, that doesn't fit on a shirt very well. 

The other reason I won't be ordering one of these shirts is because, well, they're kind of ugly. Like kind of really ugly. Plus, when I look at the logo my immediate thought is to wonder why I wasn't informed KSDK is considering leaving town. 

We've got a long year ahead of various grassroots campaigns, I'm sure, all aimed at convincing Bill DeWitt to open up the checkbook and pony up untold millions of dollars to keep Albert in St. Louis for the next eight to ten years. If you want to help out and be a part of the movement, by all means go order yourself a shirt to help kick the revolution off. Wear your ugly shirt proudly and be counted! No one will ever question your devotion to the Cardinals and their best player ever again. 

They may still question your fashion sense, though. 

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