Mad Libs Competition: What Did Caseyville Redneck Say to Cops?

by

comment
mad_libs.jpg
A story in today's Belleville News-Democrat with the headline "Police: Man cusses out Caseyville cops, kicks out patrol car window" grabbed our attention in a jiffy here at Daily RFT.

The story tells of a wild night Saturday at Jack's Place Bar & Grill in Caseyville that ended in a fight in the parking lot and a man passed out drunk outside the tavern.

Where the article really gets good, though, is when 31-year-old Kenneth Adams stumbles out of the bar and starts yelling at police.

But what exactly did Adams say to police? Can you help us decipher his rants by filling in the words omitted in the following News-Democrat excerpt?

Adams, described as "obviously intoxicated," allegedly exited the bar and started yelling at police: "(________) the Caseyville Police," police reported Adams saying. "The Caseyville Police are a bunch of (_________)."

Detective Jeff Wilkinson told Adams to return to the bar, but he continued with: "(_________) you! What are you going to do?"...

After police put him in a police car, he leaned back and kicked out the driver's side rear window.

"He shot the glass right in our faces," Wilkinson said.

Adams kept asking his wife for help; "I helped you (_________) so now help me," he said. She told him she couldn't help because he kicked out the window.
Cut and paste the paragraphs above with your answers (in ALL CAPS) into the comment section. The contestant with the funniest answers will receive an autographed book, courtesy of Geoffrey Delicatecharacter.

Support Local Journalism.
Join the Riverfront Times Press Club

Local journalism is information. Information is power. And we believe everyone deserves access to accurate independent coverage of their community and state. Our readers helped us continue this coverage in 2020, and we are so grateful for the support.

Help us keep this coverage going in 2021. Whether it's a one-time acknowledgement of this article or an ongoing membership pledge, your support goes to local-based reporting from our small but mighty team.

Join the Riverfront Times Club for as little as $5 a month.