[UPDATE] Would Someone Please Shoot Those Deer Stuck on Mississippi River Ice Floe?!


Update 11:41 a.m. The deer were rescued this morning. A helicopter hovered over the animals, blowing them to shore. Check out the video here.

Original story follows...

Have you come across the saddest story in St. Louis news this week?

It's the tale of two deer that have been stuck on an ice floe in the Mississippi River since at least Wednesday. KSDK Channel 5 is all over the story, providing damn-near hourly updates on the unfortunate critters as they slip and slide across the ice and look forlornly (with those wet, black eyes) at the camera crew on shore. 

The deer are stranded about a quarter mile out on the Illinois side of the river near Godfrey. Officials with the Department of Natural Resources say they don't have the resources to save the animals. Moreover, such a rescue could be dangerous and the animals will likely die of hypothermia even if they are saved.

Yes, it's a sad, sad story. Which is why someone needs to kill the animals posthaste.

Am I a heartless bastard? Perhaps. But it beats the alternative of watching newscasters continue their maudlin updates.

Also, consider this: Hunters in Illinois just finished blasting away more than 98,000 deer. What's two more to that death toll?

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