Is the Party Over On Missouri's Rivers this Summer?


With all of the state's other problems apparently solved, last week in the waning hours of the legislative session Missouri lawmakers took on the final problem plaguing the Show-Me State.

The Missouri House and Senate voted to ban from the state's rivers:

- beer bongs
- Styrofoam coolers
- Mardi Gras beads

- Jell-O shots were miraculously rescued from prohibition at the last minute.

Political Fix reports that Republican Senator Delbert Scott proposed the new rules in an amendment to a larger crime bill. If approved by Governor Jay Nixon, possession of the party items on any state river (except the Missouri, Mississippi, and Osage) would be a misdemeanor.

Obviously, the proposed law is meant to target rowdy summertime float trip rafters who tend to not be the most environmentally conscious group on Missouri's waterways. In that sense it's easy to see why non-biodegradable Styrofoam and Mardi Gras beads (picture a little bird getting strangled by a necklace like it was one of those un-cut plastic six-pack things) -- but beer bongs? Really?

You can bet Senator Scott won't be getting many float trip invites this summer.


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