Osama Bin Laden is dead, and suddenly countless well meaning, appallingly jingoistic songs made in the wake of 9/11 have taken on a whole new context. We'd call it vindication except we actually listened to this stuff for over an hour, and... let's just say the straight-faced coverage feels way, way better. The ten worst songs inspired by Osama Bin Laden:
10. "Let's Roll" by DC Talk Make sure you get to the 4:30 mark for the least soulful gospel breakdown in history (with rap/screaming!) Also: "Now's the time/The time is now." Nice.
9. "Raise Up (USA Flag Remix)" by Petey Pablo Nothing like a lazy remix to capitalize on the wrecked emotions of millions of people
8. "Fuck You, Osama Bin Laden" The question is: What, exactly, are the "yeah yeahs"? We're going to say, judging by the singer's tone, that it's a friendly sort of thing.
7. "Welcome To Hell" by Trace Adkins Just so everyone's clear: In this song, Trace Adkins is singing as Satan.
6. "Hey Mr. Taliban" Oh, Internet: Just when we didn't need a remix of a novelty song to make it vaguely topical and not especially funny, you were there to give us exactly that.
5. "Courtesy Of The Red, White And Blue (The Angry American)" by Toby Keith Mostly what we learn here is that Toby Keith is excellent at showing up at military functions.
4. "Osama (Yo' Momma)" by Ray Stevens It's a man wearing clothes he knows are culturally incorrect, doling out the wrong currency! Jokes!
3. "This Ain't No Rag, It's A Flag" by Charlie Daniels This song is based on comparing a turban to a flag, which is sort of like saying, "This Ain't No T-Shirt, It's A Bumper Sticker."
2. "Iraq and I Roll There's a lot of this going on throughout this list, but it's especially egregious here: You can't just yank idioms at random, throw them at puns and drawl the whole thing over a guitar line and expect it to mean something
1. "When the Eagle Cries" by Iced Earth DON'T YOU DARE MAKE THE EAGLE CRY
Riverfront Times works for you, and your support is essential.
Our small but mighty local team works tirelessly to bring you high-quality, uncensored news and cultural coverage of St. Louis and beyond.
Unlike many newspapers, ours is free – and we'd like to keep it that way, because we believe, now more than ever, everyone deserves access to accurate, independent coverage of their community.
Whether it's a one-time acknowledgement of this article or an ongoing pledge, your support helps keep St. Louis' true free press free.