Everyone knows "Last Christmas," the super-synthy song popularized by Wham! in the 1980s. But have you ever really read the lyrics to the song? Sure, the chorus is totally sappy and melancholy: "Last Christmas, I gave you my heart / But the very next day, you gave it away / This year, to save me from tears / I'll give it to someone special."
Actually, it's totally proto-emo.
But the rest of the song? Might be the most bitter holiday song of all time. To wit:
Once bitten and twice shy / I keep my distance but you still catch my eye / Tell me, baby, do you recognise me? / Well it's been a year, it doesn't surprise me
I wrapped it up and sent it / With a note saying "I love you" I meant it / Now I know what a fool I've been / But if you kissed me now, I know you'd fool me again.
A crowded room, friends with tired eyes / I'm hiding from you and your soul of ice / My God, I thought you were someone to rely on / Me? I guess I was a shoulder to cry on.
"Soul of ice"? BURN. YOU GO, GIRL.