This is a hamburger made out of a doughnut.
Or, this is a doughnut with a hamburger filling.
This is a yeast doughnut stuffed with a "hog burger" patty, topped with maple caramelized onion glaze, and pimento Cheez Whiz.
This is the end. This is the end of food.
This abomination is the brainchild of the guys at -- where else -- Strange Donuts (2709 Sutton Boulevard, Maplewood; 314-932-5851) and Rick Lewis, chef and owner of Quincy Street Bistro (6931 Gravois Avenue; 314-353-1588). Lewis cooked up the patties -- just like the "hog burger" he serves at Quincy -- and caramelized the onions, and the boys at Strange brought the doughnuts and the maple glaze. Satan himself provided the Cheez Whiz and pimento topping.
"I was unsure about it. But once we put it together I was like, 'This thing is really freaking good,'" says Lewis. "It's local pork, local beef, house-cured bacon, the whole bit. It's pretty legit. It's kind of ridiculous, but it tastes good."
Strange has already done several collaborations with places like Porter's Fried Chicken (chicken and waffles doughnut) and Salume Beddu (mostarda and Guanciale doughnut), but none of these quite managed to bring 3.5 billion years worth of heterotrophic evolution to a screeching halt.
I mean, look at it:
LOOK AT IT.
STARE INTO ITS DEAD PIMENTO EYES.
Gut Check tasted one at its debut on Thursday night -- we were struck first by the extreme sweetness of the glaze and smokiness of the onions, then the succulent pork and beef patty (cooked about medium) shone through, then we lost consciousness and woke up Through the Cooking Glass. Here, the rivers run with donkey sauce, cronuts are used as currency and the one-taste-budded man is king.
Join us, won't you? The Strange Hog Burger will be available for $5 tonight and tomorrow starting at 9 p.m. at Strange Donuts. Then it disappears as it mysteriously as it appeared (that is, until Lewis brings it back as a special at Quincy, which he says he plans to).