by Liz Miller
Advertising Age reports that on November 6, Denny's will launch a limited-time menu inspired by Peter Jackson's film The Hobbit, to be released on December 14.
Because Bilbo Baggins wouldn't be at all horrified by Denny's "Build Your Own Hobbit Slam," which is a real thing it's serving. What, like carbo-loading six times a day is acceptable but cannibalism makes you a monster?
The menu item names are so boilerplate and silly they're almost endearing. It's like applying the porn star name generator of "take your middle name and pair it with the name of the street you grew up on" to restaurant dishes. You can't lose! Except hobbits usually don't have middle names and they live in holes, but you know. Whatever. "Lonely Mountain Treasure" sounds a lot Tolkien-er than "French toast squares with cream cheese icing."
More teeth-grinding are the "Frodo's Pot Roast Skillet," "Gandalf's Gobble Melt," "Radagast's Red Velvet Pancake Puppies" and "Radagast's Red Velvet Pancake Puppies Sundae." Don't get us started about why Radagast or Frodo are roped into a menu supposedly inspired by a movie based on the novel The Hobbit. Just blame Peter Jackson.
But then there's "Bilbo's Berry Smoothie," "Hobbit Hole Breakfast" and "Lone-Lands Campfire Cookie Milk Shake," which though nonsense, are so bad we can't help but smile. You're crazy for this one, Denny's.
In total the menu includes eleven breakfast, lunch and dinner meals. National promotion of the Hobbit menu launches November 12 and, according to Advertising Age, the menu will be available at Denny's through early January.