Patriotic Foods Invade Dierbergs

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It's mid-May, but to shop in Dierbergs last weekend, it looked more like late June, judging from the end caps and displays filled with red, white, and blue foods that normally aren't red, white, and/or blue. We have no idea why, but have some theories:

1. It's almost Memorial Day, which someone remembered was intended as a day to honor the war dead. Not a day to piece together what the hell you did at the lake for the three days prior.

2. Independence Day, like all holidays, now requires two months of preparation and purchasing.

3. Bin Laden, baby! USA! USA! USA!

Whatever the reason, here's a look at the patriotic mayhem.

Tootsie Dots

Yeah, it's candy, which doesn't have a natural color. Might as well be red, white, and blue.
  • Yeah, it's candy, which doesn't have a natural color. Might as well be red, white, and blue.

Blow Pop Minis

In other countries, you have to choose between candy and gum. But not in America! You can have your candy and your gum, without that pesky stick. This is what we fought for.
  • In other countries, you have to choose between candy and gum. But not in America! You can have your candy and your gum, without that pesky stick. This is what we fought for.

Peanuts

As American as the Cards-Cubs rivalry. With some Dodger hate thrown in because they needed blue. And some Yankee white.
  • As American as the Cards-Cubs rivalry. With some Dodger hate thrown in because they needed blue. And some Yankee white.

R.W. Garcia Liberty Tortilla Chips

Except in Arizona, where they're called R.W. Garcia Show Me Your Papers Chips.
  • Except in Arizona, where they're called R.W. Garcia Show Me Your Papers Chips.

Pillsbury Stars and Stripe Cake Mix and Frosting

World War I soldiers were nicknamed doughboys. This doughboy just ran the enemy through with a bayonette, so let's have cake!
  • World War I soldiers were nicknamed doughboys. This doughboy just ran the enemy through with a bayonette, so let's have cake!
They already had blue Lofthouse cookies with yellow sprinkles. But they didn't have the "Patriotic" seal of approval.
  • They already had blue Lofthouse cookies with yellow sprinkles. But they didn't have the "Patriotic" seal of approval.

A bunch of patriotic decor junk for the table.

Show your love for this great country with a red, white, and blue sock monkey. Made in China.
  • Show your love for this great country with a red, white, and blue sock monkey. Made in China.

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