Recalls! Don't Eat Anything This Week!



Everyone panic! No food is safe this week, as one recall after another is announced.

Lean Cuisine's added a questionable new ingredient to their Simple Favorites Spaghetti with Meatballs - shards of red plastic in the meatballs. Nestle, the owner of Lean Cuisine, didn't say how many packages are in the recall, just that the bad batch was packaged in late October, so most of the products have already been sold. Check your freezers for UPC code 13800-10390 with the production code 0298595519 P.

You can make your own meatballs to ensure they're not spiked with plastic. Just don't use Creekstone Farms ground beef. The Kansas-based company's recalled seven tons of ground beef due to possible E. coli contamination. The meat was sold to wholesalers and repackaged under many brand and store names. In Missouri the meat was sold at Price Cutter, Ramey, Country Market, Murfin, Mike's Market, Smitty, and Bistro Market stores.

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How about some chocolate milk to soothe your nerves after all this bad meat news? Okay, as long as it's not from Oak Farms Diary in Texas. The company's recalled its chocolate milk products due to the presence of Alkaline Phosphatase, which indicates the milk wasn't up to pasteurization standards.

Too overcome with fear to make a peanut butter and jelly sandwich? There's always pre-made, frozen Pierre brand's "pb jamwich". Just make sure it's not from the lot with UPC code 7599921368. Those have listeria.

Field Day Organic Garbanzo Bean's might be safe. Just don't be surprised if it's actually minestrone in the can. The company's recalled cans with UPC code 42563 60003 because they might be mislabeled.

Screw it. Give up food and just consume whey protein powder. Like Whey-26 Protein Powder. Which has been recalled because of salmonella contamination.