Yesterday we questioned the proliferation of celebrity-owned chicken restaurants, with the opening of Flavor Flav's first Flav's Fried Chicken in Clinton, Iowa. But Flav's foray into food service left us with a second question: do you really want to eat food made by this guy?
Sure, we all make mistakes. Plenty of non-famous folks have made out with a pack of faux nurses and then returned to frying chicken for paying customers with no one the wiser.
But with celebrities, we see their every move. Every mistake. Every questionable decision. And sometimes, we can't help but connect the artist with the food's flavor. It's not always a shining endorsement.
Kid Rock's Badass American Lager Sure, it's from a craft brewery in Kid's homestate of Michigan. That's good. Can you shake the thought that it tastes like Pam Anderson residue and nylon pant sweat left over from Woodstock '99 with aromas of stale cigars and Detroit Coney dog belches?
Ron de Jeremy Rum In light of the large variety of fluids porn star Jeremy could contribute to his new signature Panamanian rum, that American Badass seems downright tasty. At least it probably won't have hair floating in it. Besides, we established earlier this month that Jeremy's not the most hygienic food service professional.
Please don't make us post that video again.
Montel Williams' Living Well Pressure Cooker Think of talk shows that peaked in the 1990s, and the ability to control pressurized situations doesn't come to mind. At least Montel has psychic Sylvia Browne on his side. She can predict when his cooker's gonna blow.
Rachel Ray Nutrish Dog Food Most of Ray's human recipes consist of opening cans and dumping ingredients together, which makes it hard to imagine that her dog food isn't a blend of canned black beans and potted meat product. But really? It's dog food. Most dogs would be content with a full kitty litter box and an open toilet.
Jeff Foxworthy's Ham Jerky If you eat this comedian's leathery old ham you are not smarter than a fifth grader. And you also might be a redneck. Quit encouraging him, Rach!
Dale Earnhardt Jr.'s Big Mo' Candy Bars The Big Mo' is neither a homophobic slur or a statement on the sexual fluidity those who nosh on the giant peanut butter or caramel-filled chocolate bars. It's an homage to his hometown of Mooresville, North Carolina, dubbed the Big Mo' by Earnhardt's friends, the Dirty Mo' Posse.
Yum. Do you trust the chocolate-choosing abilities of someone with these decision-making skills?
That's what they called the leftovers from the set of his first film, "The Italian Stallion".
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